They say that things happen in the blink of an eye. They’re not wrong. But to capture those moments we never get to experience twice is the important part of living in a world that only goes faster, and more forward.
But what does it mean when you say you want to do things,
things that are but grand gestures for all the world to see.
How often do you find a friend who you cannot label? That one friend who is just beyond description, because everything that you do together has become routine, but always exciting.
Do you have that kind of label-impossible friend?
1. That friend who you think or consider to be a best friend but never tell them that, because both of you have so many people you consider best friends that you think it’s intrusive, inappropriate, or weird.
2. When you absolutely have nothing to do, or talk about, and yet you spend hours and hours without end together in each other’s company. Or when you both have something different to do, and you’d rather finish your work in the presence of the other.
3. When you’d rather have them just get your phone and let them fiddle with it, because you trust them completely – or because you’re too lazy to do what they ask you (e.g. “Hey, can you text ____ for me?” “No, you do it yourself, here’s my phone.”)
4. You finish each other’s sentences or answer for them when you meet new people, because you practically know them inside and out. You sometimes might tweak some facts or exaggerate, to your advantage. No harm in doing so.
5. There are automatic activities you do when you go to places like the mall: Enter mall, window shop here and there, scrutinize people (okay maybe that’s just me), stop for lunch, go back to shopping, and head home.
6. You think they’re psychic. They have that strong gut feeling about things. They know if something’s wrong with you, and they want you to tell them.
7. Your family considers them to be part of your family, and love them just as much.
8. People associate you with each other, and sometimes think you’re their keeper or vice versa. When they want to ask about you, they ask that friend.
9. You’d drop everything you’re doing just for them.
10. You know the little things about them, and love it.
11. The stories you exchange with them range from their morning’s toothpaste mishap to big promotions news at work, and it’s all fun, all interesting, all the time.
12. Thoughts of them are evoked whenever you spot their favorite colors, favorite food, favorite shows, and pretty much favorite everything.
13. You argue but when you wake up the morning, thoughts of your mistakes are all gone.
14. They’re your personal fashion consultant.
15. They hit you with the painful truth, but that makes you respect them and listen to them more.
You know when you’ve grown up with something and you tell yourself that you’re never going to part with it? Like a security blanket you’ve had for years and still keep beside you when you sleep? What about a place so near and dear to you, you keep coming back to it, and consider it a second home? Or even people you whom you consider to be the best friends ever, that despite no blood-relation, you’re definite that they are family? All of these things tug at heartstrings so sensitive, that when the slightest memory of it is triggered, you’re all in shambles trying to pick up your sensibility.
The knot in my stomach turned into a defeated sigh, disarming me of all thoughts capable of inducing injury. What did it matter if I could act on my own? The terms were irreconcilable, and improbable from the very beginning. Spare me the drama and bring me the verdict, because for whatever reason it ended up this way, the beginning was never relevant.
Numb with berating as I was, it felt as though Plexi-Glas was set between a scream and my thoughts. Nothing ever passed through audibly, and I merely gave it a good look, with all the freedom to ostracize and mock the one bound in shame and wrongdoing. Let me press a dagger to the throat of pestilence, with the blade sharpened by a weathered heart and insubstantial wit. That would sink in maybe five inches – more or less.
It wasn’t a sinking feeling that ended just there. Where else would I swim to find a pseudonym for respite? Not that it mattered, because I knew I’d be weaving tapestries of gold and brilliance sold to souls that clawed for endless affection. A simple “Thank you” would suffice, if not for the conversions between each mouth. Where kindness should have weighed oceans was only but a dime in an iron-pressed suit of a man, who had no distinctions of perfunctory handshakes as alms or a welcome.
I scoffed, a supposedly obvious gesture of “I’ve had enough of your bullshit,” but everyone’s been desensitized with rain showers of narcissism, of selfish ambition. They all wade in the murky waters, hoping to catch a decorative star to hang up on their mantles, basking in the shadow of their own demise. “Turn around, and maybe you’ll see what you’ve been doing.” I then burned up the Welcome mat, it just keeps getting ignored.
Twenty years. What do two decades sum up to?
A span of twenty years would be enough to change a country’s economy. It could also be enough for one to accumulate wealth. It could mean a lifespan of somebody.
Now I sort of understand why K-drama characters love rooftops.
Very conducive for clearing your head, and the vast landscape is more than breathtaking to visually swallow in one sitting. You’ll always be able to see activity, simultaneous and bustling.
My rooftop experience tonight was note-worthy.
The dancing lights under a dusk canopy plays calmly with your eyes, and you never know where to focus your attention on: will it be the blinking stars, or the steady tower lights – red and glaring, or even the intensified cluster of city lights that provoke the darkness with its radiance.
Also, lightning was a fine touch to the monotonous gradient of darkness tonight.
Everything was capped off with such refreshing wisps (blasts, actually, but they were gentle enough to suit the mood) of wind.
A+ evening, thank You Lord. I do believe I’m ready for a new season.